Ok, this is going to be quick. Just a rundown of a few movies I’ve seen recently and brief reviews of them. I would do a long review for each but frankly I don’t have time. My semester is ending and I have tons of work stacked up. So here we go.
Let’s start off with “The Ruins”, not bad but forgettable. I watched it last night and it was a fun little horror flick but there was nothing really special about it. The plot was basic but adequate, the setting was nice if somewhat limited (not a complaint unless a movie based almost completely in one setting bothers you, I know some people who don’t like that), and the characters are shallow. I know I defended the characters in “Cloverfield” and it could be argued these characters were from the same mould, but the characters in “Cloverfield” showed some depth on occasion, the characters in “The Ruins” mad me angry. The foreign guy and the blond were the only characters I liked and just from watching the trailer I knew the blonds chances of survival were slim. Speaking of dying horribly, the gore is top notch. It’s actually where the movie shines. Nothing puts a smile on my face like sever lacerations…um yeah, the gore is good. So in conclusion I give it a B-, and I recommend it to horror junkies but no one else. For normal people it could be a fun flick to rent or see on TV but certainly not a must see.
Now from average horror to truly excellent horror. I watched a movie that allowed me to finally say goodbye to slasher flicks, because lets face it the genre is basically dead. "Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon" is like an homage to all our favourite slashers. It is the story of Leslie Vernon a man who wants to be the next Jason or Myers and is filmed as a documentary. For most of the movie he’s followed by a film crew who watch him set up for that final night which will make him a legend. Periodically it shifts to a cinematic view when it’s most adequate. This movie is extremely stylish, clever, and at times wickedly funny. For fans of horror and especially slashers this is an A+ movie and I completely recommend it. For the general public it’s a fun little flick but it will be little more because you need to be a fan to get some of the references and jokes.
Anyone who knows me or has read my blogs knows I absolutely love “Cloverfield”, so it should be no surprise that I really enjoyed “Diary of The Dead”. Is it as good as “Cloverfield”? No, but it’s still a solid zombie movie that fans of the genre will love. Not as tightly made as “Cloverfield” and not as stunning, but at the same time it takes the same idea and makes it its own. There are some really nice scenes and the social commentary isn’t bad (though at times it seems a little forced). It’s a B, not great but fans of the genre will have a lot of fun with it.
Last and most certainly least “In The Name of The King”, a fucking horrible movie by the brilliant (retarded) director (asshole) Uwe Boll. This is a poor, bootleg “Lord of The Rings” and Boll never attempts to prove otherwise. There are so many lapses of logic I really don’t know how anyone could have written some of these things down: like any war movie night means flaming arrows; too bad it’s raining out (guess the rain doesn’t matter), wow the main characters name is Farmer; oh it’s because he’s a farmer (WTF), the orcs shoot other orcs off catapults for so kind o surprise attack, oh it’s night time guess it’s time to shoot flaming orcs…oh Christ…they are shooting flaming Orcs…and the list could go on. Realistically as awful as it was it could still be watchable, if not for the music. This has got to be the worst soundtrack I have ever heard, and that includes the music from “Turkish Star Wars” which was the theme from “Raiders of The Lost Arch” played over and over again. It seems like Boll was going for that epic feel that that all fantasy films try to do with booming orchestral scores, but it would seem he’s as tone deaf as he is inept at film making. This movie is epic fail and as such gets an F. If I hadn’t seen “House of The Dead” I would say this was his worst movie, and now I get to look forward to “Postal” and “Far Cry”, oh what joy.
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2 comments:
Did you say flaming orcs?? That's my favourite! :p Wow, I really wanna see that movie now :D
Yes, they set their own troops on fire and shot them of catapultes...It certainly is an experience, though I wouldn't suggest watching it the whole was through. Just fastforward and catch the trly rediculuse parts.
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